Having the Talk: How Advisors Can Encourage Caregiving Conversations

We all get by with a little help from our friends. Or increasingly, our family. 

More than 32 million adults in the US are financial caregivers for someone age 65 or older. And according to a recent Edward Jones study of 3,000 of them, eight in 10 are willing to put their own financial security aside to support the person they’re caring for. As people live longer, funds for important goals like the caregiver’s own retirement are often used for caregiving. Only about a third of respondents said their caregiving responsibilities were discussed ahead of time. 

As stressful as that may be, it offers an opportunity for financial advisors. Half of the financial caregivers said they work with an advisor for their own finances, and 44% of those first engaged with an advisor because of their caregiving responsibilities.

“People are looking for someone who can help them walk through this stage of life and navigate the often complicated and stressful financial work that comes with it,” says Julia Bartak, a financial advisor with Edward Jones. “We have an important opportunity to provide families with greater confidence and help them care for the people who matter most without sacrificing the financial future they’ve worked so hard to build.”

Tough Conversations  

Clients have been talking more about caregiving, but conversations rarely start with that word, said Kevin Coombs, senior financial planner at Donaldson Capital Management. Instead, it’s spurred by small changes: an adult child begins checking in on a parent more often, trading notes with siblings and noticing subtle shifts in memory or behavior.

Both the older and younger generations fear the parent becoming a burden to their child, which makes having the initial conversations scary. But advisors can help: 

• That can start with paperwork, like a signed power of attorney naming someone the parent trusts. “The paperwork is usually the easy part,” Coombs said. “The conversation is the hard part, and the documents give it a place to start.” 
• Clients typically aren’t looking for a product or more information; they’re looking for clarity, said Ranie Verby, director of practice management at Plancorp. “They want help understanding their unique situation and its related options,” she said. “They want help to evaluate tradeoffs, determine who will take on different responsibilities and make thoughtful decisions before a crisis forces their hand.” 

Putting Yourself First. Part of the role of an advisor is helping clients see that protecting their own retirement isn’t selfish, said Eileen Olson of Emerald Wealth. “It keeps their children from becoming the next caregivers.”